The Wanderer

Part of a series where I am publishing all the draft that have lived in my compose page for several years, it is time they saw light of day. June 2016 Yesterday, as one of my friends was packing her bags to go back home to Stockholm, our conversation turned towards the question: Do looks matter? From there it took a turn about the pain of not being seen. The only real acceptance I have got in terms of my size has been outside my own country. The lack of care and 'looks' from the Chinese made me more comfortable in  my skin. US is where I actually received, the full be more confident, be more happy about yourself vibe. Even though the feminist in me, firmly wants to believe that they do not, the reality keeps coming back to bite me. I am writing this, not as a means to complain, but to acknowledge the pain of not being visible . How all of us ignore/bully those who are not appealing to our senses... In my original draft I had written this:  Here is to those 'fr

Dear so-called 'token' girl,  When you look around and you find you are the only girl in the room where important discussion are being held and decisions are being made, I want you to remember these seven things: First : Congratulations for making it there! You know it better than anyone else that it has not been easy. Second : Do not let anyone undermine your presence, your effort and your success. More importantly… do not undermine your own presence, your own effort and your own success. Some of those who have always been in that room, will feed on the slightest of your self-doubt and use it to tell you why either you do not deserve to be here, or you are here because you were lucky, or worse, you are here because someone in the room was too kind. Third : I hate to say it because it is a massive responsibility but you do represent the rest of us who could not join you there. Hence, I implore you to stand your ground, let your voice be heard and do not be afraid of