The Wanderer

We should not be proud/ashamed of the things to which we did not make any contribution. Being born in a certain country/culture (you did not have a choice plus you did not make special efforts to even know your culture; in fact there are people from other countries who can beat you with their knowledge about your country/culture ), being born with certain gifts like beauty or intelligence (you should be proud of what you did with the gift, instead of the gift itself) or achievements/failures of fellow countrymen (when you did not even know anything about their journey or made any contribution or support before they became an 'overnight' success). We can be happy for them, be inspired by them but pride, if at all, should come from the results of our own actions.

When somebody 'shares a memory' on fb, I always think of glass vials, silvery threads and pensieves.  (All HP fans raise your h(w)ands!)

When we are living some moments, we think or at least hope that there will be many more of them. But the truth is we don't know what we have already done for the last time, who we have already met for the last time...

Human brain likes to be ‘aware’. It wants to be able to say ‘Yeah, I know this. I have seen this before.’ Hence, when it perceives something new, it immediately wants to label it based on something it has previously experienced. It wants to know where to ‘file’ this new information - wanting to classify into different boxes which can be pulled from the attic when needed. Now, when the brain doesn’t know what to do with a piece of new information it either files it under the already existing boxes in it or tries to create a new box. I think as we grow up, our ability to create these new boxes keeps diminishing. As new- borns, when we open our eyes, everything is classified under ‘new’ or ‘weird’ or ‘ what the fuck was that?’, and then gradually we start creating more boxes: ‘food’, ‘mommy’, ‘safe’, ‘scary’… As we grow up we keep creating more and more boxes by labeling information we process. We develop boxes of ‘likes’ and ‘dislikes’, ‘stuff I know for sure’, and then slowl...

How to create under confident women: Tell them that if they do not use fairness creams, no one will marry them. Tell them that if they do not look a certain way, no one will love them. Make sure they do not talk to guys in school/college, because you know Sanskaar . When they come to you about marital problems, try to find a way to blame them for it. Of course, she is to be blamed, after all how can the son be wrong?  Make her believe, that no matter how wrong the husband is, it is her duty to 'adjust'. And if she can't, she is not a good enough wife.  Tell her that she should be thankful that she is so lucky, you know 'it could be worse'.  Tell her that no matter who she becomes, the men will be rated higher than you. Equality? Bah, humbug. Scare them into believing that if they stood up for themselves, they will be outlawed by the society. And that this is a bad thing. Oh, and to be clear, most times it is women who make other women believe this. Yeah...

Loss can teach you so much. One of the most heartwarming pieces I have read. Or maybe just related to it. Excerpts from Sheryl Sandberg's moving tribute to her husband. The most powerful one-line prayer: “Let me not die while I am still alive.” The choice offered by tragedy I think when tragedy occurs, it presents a choice. You can give in to the void, the emptiness that fills your heart, your lungs, constricts your ability to think or even breathe. Or you can try to find meaning. These past thirty days, I have spent many of my moments lost in that void. And I know that many future moments will be consumed by the vast emptiness as well. I have lived thirty years in these thirty days. I am thirty years sadder. I feel like I am thirty years wiser. But when I can, I want to choose life and meaning.  Being a mother I have gained a more profound understanding of what it is to be a mother, both through the depth of the agony I feel when my children scream and cry and from the c...

Mental clarity is one of the most underrated assets.